08/17/2021 Sounds of silence

Yay! I slept through to my alarm this morning. I still feel like a zombie, but in all fairness, I’ve only gotten through half of my cup of coffee.

My mind is a blank right now, too. I usually have at least something at rumbling around in my brain, even at this hour and level of (de)caffeination. In all honesty, I’m enjoying the silence. In the apartment, and in my brain. All I can hear, really, is the clacking of the keyboard as I type, and occasionally, the compressor on the refrigerator as it cycles off. It’s kinda loud and gives me a jolt, at times, but this morning, it’s not much of a nuisance.

The stillness of the morning gives me the canvas I need to review the reasons for my comportment, of late.

I’m thinking that maybe I slept well because all of the catastrophic things I thought could happen (tin foil hat, remember?), did not. Happen, that is. My son is home, and he had a good time. He needed that trip to see his grandparents. And he needed the affirmation that 1) he could handle whatever came, and 2) that this was a repeatable experience.

With that knowledge, even the mess he came back to at work, and a few snafus with the purchase of a second-hand refrigerator (the neighbor who just moved in a few months ago is moving back to the Midwest which means a brand new fridge for us at the low, low price of $325. Score!) meant he sailed through those glitches with aplomb.

Oh, I forgot how much I like that word: aplomb.

a·plomb/əˈpläm,əˈpləm/noun

  1. self-confidence or assurance, especially when in a demanding situation

Someone once wrote a recommendation for me using that word. I thought it old-fashioned, at the time, but I really kinda dig it, now. In that situation especially, as well as now.

But back to the sounds of silence.

I can’t help singing the harmony portion of this song whenever I hear it. I sang a lot of songs like this when I was in choir in Junior High. Our director was a little bit of a hippy dippy, but he got the best from us. As I think of him, now, I get a little pang. About 12 years ago, I learned he had passed away quite tragically from FFS–Fatal Familial Insomnia. What a cruel condition.

Sigh. Flight of ideas right now. Back to the song.

Now there are a few interpretations of the song’s lyrics, but given what I read in the Wiki, the song had a political lean. Written in 1963, it speaks to the tenor of what was going on in the US, the world, and the movements of resistance, if you will, that were cropping up all over.

We see that happening today, especially in the US. Now, I said I wouldn’t be getting political in this blog. And I won’t. But I am not the type to stay silent about such matters. While I don’t participate in marches, protests, or other public demonstrations, there has been a time or two when I wanted to get out there. Make my voice heard, stand beside those I support. I’m not sure what’s stopped me.

Fear?

But ask me one on one? You will get my unvarnished opinion.

Regardless, one could argue I am silent on such matters if I don’t shout my position from the rooftops. And I take no offense to that. We are who we are and we do what we do.

For now, I’m happy for my son (it’s a mom thing that I’m sure some of you understand) and I’m grateful that I slept to my normal wake-up time today. I now have a full cup and a half of coffee in me, and feel the lethargy leaving my mind. Time to make the treacherous commute from the living room couch to the home office, 10 feet away. It won’t be long until the stillness in my brain is replaced with the clashing and clanging of the day, both audibly and mentally.

One last sip, though. Maybe a stretch. But definitely a smile.

It’s amazing how differently things look when the tin foil hat comes off and you’ve got a good night’s sleep under your belt.

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